Installing Wife (Humor)

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I made the mistake of upgrading from Girlfriend 6.0 to Wife 1.0 and began seeing unexpected results. The program began spawning child processes that used up a lot of space and valuable system resources. In the product brochure I couldn’t read anything on this issue.

In addition to this, Wife 1.0 installed itself into most, if not all, other programs and now launches during system initialization to monitor all other system activity.

My favorite applications such as Pokernight 9.3, Drunken Boys Night 3.5 and Saturday Football 4.0 no longer seem to run, crashing the system whenever executed. Also, I’m unable to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while trying to run some of other important applications. I have tried to revert back to Girlfriend 6.0, but the uninstall also doesn’t seem to work on this program.

Please, help!
Thanks, Bart


Dear Bart,

We often see this misconception about Wife 1.0. The problem is that many people upgrade from Girlfriend 6.0 to Wife 1.0 thinking that Wife 1.0 is merely a entertainment software. Others think it’s a utilities application. The truth is, Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and has been designed to run everything.

Purging Wife 1.0 and converting back to Girlfriend 6.0 is not an option, because hidden operating files within the system would cause Girlfriend 6.0 to emulate Wife 1.0. Once installed, these files are impossible to uninstall or delete. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 6.0 because Wife 1.0 is not designed to do that. Also, some experienced users have attempted to install Girlfriend 7.0 or Wife 2.0 just to end up with more problems than what the original system had caused them.

My advice to you is to keep Wife 1.0 and try to live with it. Look into your manual under “Warnings – Maintenance / Child Support”.

A few tips:

Installing background application program “C:\yes dear” to alleviate software augmentation.

Having Wife 1.0 installed myself, I also recommend your reading the whole section on General Partnership Faults (GPFs). You agreed to assume all responsibility for faults and problems that might occur, regardless of their cause.

The best way to deal with these is by entering the command “C:\I apologize”.

Don’t use “yes dear” excessively, because in the end you’ll end up having to use the “I apoolgize” command before the operating system will return to normal.

You can prevent all the above inconveniences by simply taking the blame for all GPFs. The system will run smoothly as long as this is happening.
Keep in mind that Wife 1.0 is a great program; it’s just very high maintenance.

Try buying and installing additional pieces of software to improve the performance of Wife 1.0., such as Flowers 7.2 and Diamonds 4.0.
Install Secretary In Short Skirt 1.0 under no circumstances install. It’s not supported by the operating system and is likely to cause irreversible damage to the system.

Best regards,
Tech Support

The Other side

One comment on “Installing Wife (Humor)

  1. Pingback: Marriage Jokes - Quotes About Marriage .Com

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